I miss my husband.

I miss my husband. I am sick of checking my email every 10 minutes hoping to hear anything from him. I hate waking up at night in a cold lonely bed. I hate putting the twins to bed every night by myself. I am sick of faking a smile and pretending to be strong. I hate that I don't have the energy to be the mom the twins need but I need to get away from them and can't. I hate that I have forgotten how it feels to be wrapped in his arms. I have had it with the time zone difference. I can't stand the major delay on the phones. I hate trying to be mom and dad all the time. I am tired of trying to push the "what ifs" out of my head all the time. I hate not feeling like I am complete. I miss my husband and I want him home.